


Something

by Glowpear



Category: EXO (Band), K-pop
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Bittersweet, Friendship, M/M, One Shot, Possibly Unrequited Love, Slice of Life, Teenagers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-24
Updated: 2019-05-24
Packaged: 2020-03-14 15:36:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18950989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glowpear/pseuds/Glowpear
Summary: From friends to lovers. That’s usually how the story goes if two people share mutual feelings for each other. But what if these feelings are never pursued? What if these two people never kiss each other, never confess to each other or proceed to that state of lovers, even if the love is there? What does it make them, what does their relationship become?





	Something

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this is a short something (haha) I wrote today. The story is pretty cryptic and open for interpretation, but it’s basically about two school boys who befriend each other and finally fall in love. Timing never really works out and both of them are far to shy to admit their feelings for each other until it’s simply to late and they eventually grow distant. It’s kinda autobiographic, to be honest. It’s dedicated to all these in-between / almost lovers relationships that never went past the stage of something and to all the missed opportunities and misunderstandings. 
> 
> So here it is, hope you enjoy it.
> 
> *Also, English isn't my first language, so please bear with me, if there are any grammar mistakes, wrong vocabulary or falsely used commas. ( And feel free to correct me and leave comments :) )

_****_ **Something**

 

Minseok knew it was coming for quite a while now. He didn’t really want to admit it, but deep down he had known it all along. After all it wasn’t like they were together to begin with.

 

Minseok always thought there was, well, _something_ between them. But how deep could that _something_ run if he wasn’t even able to put a label on it.

 

They’ve had _moments_ , sure. Minseok was aware that there was always this kind of _tension_ between them. But it had never led to anything. They _never touched_ beyond friendly hugs, they _never confessed their love_ for each other, hell, they _didn’t even kiss_ each other.

 

And yet. Yet, there was _something_ between them.

 

Unfortunately, every little ray of light, every little sprout, every little glimmer of hope, will eventually fade out if not tended to, if not cared for, if _not_... _pursued_.

 

So really, Minseok shouldn’t have been surprised, but that doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt. Luhan and him had been dancing around each other for years now. Three years to be exact.

 

First they were _friends_. Just that, nothing more. Friends. Friends who chatted effortlessly, friends who found each other’s eyes across the room, friends who always stuck together. It was a neat little _label_ that had described their relationship perfectly.

 

Until they were not _just friends_ anymore. _Something_ had changed along the way, Minseok couldn’t even exactly pinpoint what it was, it was just that _something_ was different in their dynamics, in the way they behaved around each other, in the way they looked at each other. Maybe it was one too many friendly touches, exited chatters or cozy movie nights. Minseok didn’t know. All he knew was that the change had been subtle, slowly, seamless. It happened before either of them even really knew that it had happened. It had crept up on them, _infected_ them slowly and had quietly taken over their friendship.

 

Suddenly it wasn’t just _cozy_ , _comfortable_ and _casual_. No. Suddenly it was much rather _chaotic_ , _cryptic_ and _c_ _onfusing_. Minseok was suddenly _tense_ whenever Luhan was around and Luhan was suddenly very hard to decipher. At times Luhan did or say things that made Minseok _hope_ that there was… _something_. And than again this _short glimmer_ , this _tiny ray of light_ , this _warm, fussy feeling_ that was just in arms reach, was drawn away from him again.

 

Minseok had gone over it in his head. _Over_ and _over_ and _over_ again. And it all came back to this one point. _Always_ , _ever_ and _never_. Maybe, Minseok was _crazy_ for running his head over _something_ that might have never been there to begin with. Still, he felt it and that must mean that _there was...something_ , right? He couldn’t have been the only one. No, he couldn’t have been the only one to _feel_ this way, to _crave_ that way, to _yearn_ that way. No he couldn’t, _he wasn’t_.

 

So what had gone wrong? What had happened to them? Why did they never became _something_ … _a_ _thing_ , maybe? _Partners?_ _A Couple?_ _Lovers?_ Why did they never cross the path from friends to lovers, from uncertain to certain, from close to even closer, _closest_? Why was it that, whenever they sat together now, it was just awkward silence, that the closeness had disappeared all together, that the connection was lost?

 

_Lost_ was the right word, Minseok thought. It wasn’t gone it was just lost. Temporarily gone, maybe. But not erased. Not vanished. It didn’t just evaporate it just _transgressed_ _into something_ … _something different, something distant_.

 

And the distance grew. It grew and grew and grew until Minseok was sure that _the connection, the bond_ they shared was not just lost but finally _gone at last_. And not just that. I wasn’t only their bond, it was also their _label_ , that Minseok was once so sure of, that had slowly faded away.

 

Minseok had been foolish enough to believe that once _the fog, the confusion, the misunderstandings_ of that _something_ were gone, it would be replaced by _friendship_ again. But it wasn’t like that. Life wasn’t that easy. Life was complex, delusive, misleading.

 

Unfair.

 

And so it came that in the end Minseok didn’t even get _something_. He got _nothing_. And getting nothing while you had always hoped for something, while you already had a taste of it, was _another kind of pain_.

 

So really, Minseok shouldn’t have been surprised, but that _still_ doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt. It hurt to see Luhan leave for lunch without him, it hurt to see Luhan turn his back on him, it hurt to see Luhan share his first kiss with someone else. Someone who wasn't him.

 

 

 

 

Years and years later, Minseok would see Luhan at their school reunion, still so stunning, smart, sweet. _Scintillating_.

 

Their eyes met briefly and they shyly smiled at each other. Suddenly it was just the two of them again, enveloped in a certain kind of _closeness_ , _haziness_ that only seemed to be reserved for the two of them.

 

And there it was again.

 

The _tension_.

 

Broken by a slender hand that wraps around Luhan’s arm and a tender kiss that is laid upon Minseok’s cheek. The moment, as well as the tension is broken. Broken, by time, broken by age, broken by feelings left unsaid.

 

And after all that’s all it is. That’s all it ever was and all it ever will be. _J_ _ust_ _tension_.

**Author's Note:**

> I know the ending is kind of sad and bittersweet, but I actually think it’s really nice to look back at these relationships and to just entertain in the thought of what could have been. To share a knowing glance with that person, years later, and a mutual understanding. An everlasting sweet memory. I think, even if these kind of almost lovers relationships don’t work out, it will always be nice to remember these feelings because they are pure and innocent and are not tainted by mean words or ugly fall outs. They mostly just quietly fade out and even if it still hurts a bit in the end, the time it lasted will always be precious. At least it was like that in my case, so I still remember it fondly, even if the feelings are gone by now. 
> 
> *Also, all the things written in italics are the words that Minseok attributes to that something that he shares with Luhan. With all these words he tries to describe these feelings, to put a label on it. I hope that makes sense, I thought it was somehow artistic, but I hope I doesn’t bug you.


End file.
